Yesterday, I had a woman looking to buy some food, interested in the sandwiches we serve. Once she settled on her choice, she looked around her before leaning to tell me,"Okay, this may be weird, but I have OCD." I immediately said,"No, it's all good! I do, too!" Her eyes brightened. "Really?! I could hug you right now. Most people think I'm crazy!" For her comfort, I took care of everything, washing my hands several times between glove changes. She was very very grateful, stuck around for a few more hours, and came back for more food. It made me sad that this poor woman felt that she'd be perceived as "crazy" because she has OCD. Goodness, I hate how stigmatized mental illness is. In the years since writing my post, things i'm afraid to tell you, i've become even more open in discussing my condition in the hopes that it'll allow others to feel less alone.
Personally, I've always felt alone and choose to isolate myself with those feelings of despair and anxiety come around. If I'm around others, I feel like a bummer or a burden if I talk about what is bothering me. When I'm deep in a funk, I'm all alone. It's my own personal hell. To quote Arcade Fire,"My body is a cage that keeps me from dancing with the one I love, but my mind holds the key." I interpret that as I'm in my own personal mental hell, but the key is within me to fix it. I fix those feelings by reaching out to others so they feel less alone, as well as I will feel less alone. Whenever I discover something like a friend with severe anxiety or someone struggling with self-harm, I always let them tell me their stories, as well as share my own. To know that you're not the only one struggling makes a huge difference. Just remember: everybody's trying.
So, if you, my few readers, are struggling and need to not feel alone, holler. my inbox is always open: mkephotoge@gmail.com
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